Courage to Change the Things That Should be Changed

God, give me grace to accept with serenity

the things that cannot be changed,

Courage to change the things

which should be changed,

and the Wisdom to distinguish

the one from the other.

Living one day at a time,

Enjoying one moment at a time,

Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace,

Taking, as Jesus did,

This sinful world as it is,

Not as I would have it,

Trusting that You will make all things right,

If I surrender to Your will,

So that I may be reasonably happy in this life,

And supremely happy with You forever in the next.

Amen.

Those who attend any Celebrate Recovery meeting or traditional 12 step meeting know that the Serenity Prayer is often said together as a group. If you want to read about the history behind this prayer, check out this blog post  http://recoveryboxapp.blogspot.com/2013/02/the-serenity-prayer-history-behind-it.html

I'm not going to say exactly what you should feel or think when you pray this prayer because your circumstance are different than mine - and prayers are personal.  But yesterday when I had my cup of apple cider and I saw the "Courage Mug"  (see yesterday's post if you are not up to speed) it reminded me of this prayer. 

"Courage to change the things that should be changed." The first time I ever read this prayer was at my grandmother's house. I didn't understand what it meant then being only 12 years old. Later in life I came to understand that my grandmother was an alcoholic and struggled a lot..perhaps that's why she had the prayer in her house. It's a shame because I can't ask her  what the prayer meant to her because she suffers from Alzheimers. So I can only speculate.

The line I find intriguing especially as someone who wants to solve everyone's problems is "the Wisdom to distingush one from another".  That's what I need to work on. I have got to figure out what is mine to change and what is mine to leave for others. Perhaps it sounds so easy but not for someone who deals with CoDepenedency. 

So today, there is no verse but rather I pray the Serenity Prayer and ask for the wisdom to know the difference.

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I Will Try Again Tomorrow

Isaiah 41:10'Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.'

Each morning I get my coffee with my eyes barely open. My kids know not to even approach mom before I have had a cup of Joe and five minutes to let it start working.  Each morning I walk over to the machine, pour the delicious pipeing hot fuel into a mug and breathe in deep waiting for the warmth to take over.  Yes, I LOVE my coffee.

This afternoon I decided to get a mug of hot apple cider because it's fall and a little chilly (and I don't need any more caffeine today). I can't really do much physically because of being in a cast and the need to continue to elevate my foot. So picture me, elevating my foot, with my iPad about to begin sipping on my cider. I never pay attention to the mugs we have - as long as they are giant enough to hold my hot beverage I don't care. My mother-in-law likes to buy mugs for the kids that reflect their interests and so I guess that's what I grabbed to use.

Continue to picture, I'm sitting in my recliner with my feet up and I go to reach for my mug - and I see the huge word courage on the mug. This is what the other side of the mug says "Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying "I will try again tomorrow". Wow! I don't ever remember  this mug (even though I know she had to have purchased this). 

"I will try again tomorrow". Isn't that all we can ask for? Try again tomorrow. Just because we are dealing with addictions, awful habits, hurt and hang-ups doesn't mean that others have it all figured out either. Everyone has to strive for trying again tomorrow right? So I pondered this for a bit and came to realize that if we never had our struggles and failures, we would never enjoy the accomplishment that happens when we overcome. 

Having a sense of accomplishment creates amazing pleasureable feelings inside us - and I love how that feels. I want more of that feeling!

Today, I will end my day asking God for the courage to try again tomorrow. I'm not going to ask for him to take away all the burdens (but I do that sometimes too). Today, I'm going to pray for courage to face it all head on. I'm going to ask for courage to face my challenges and for the courage to make the right choice so that I might have that sense of accomplishment. Dear God, please fill me with courage today!

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Debunking the "God Doesn't Give You More Than You Can Handle" myth.

For we do not want you to be ignorant, brothers and sisters, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead (2 Cor 1:8,9)

Has anyone ever told you during a difficult situation "Well, God only gives you what you can handle."  I've been told that many times and recently it just sent shivers down my spine. So I thought I'd talk about it here today. 

I truly believe many people say this because of two reasons. First, they misunderstand where hardships come from. And second, most people don't know what to say to offer comfort during difficult times.

First, God does not give anyone afflictions, illnesses, disabilities, addictions, war, family crisis, cancer, etc. These things happen because we live in a broken world. These things happen because we all have free will and make choices. And sometimes these choices affect us directly and sometimes our choices affect others. And sometimes, things just happen.  Nope, we have no idea why a single mom with 3 kids gets killed in a car crash on the way home from work, or why the athlete develops cancer, or why our spouse who has a wife who lives him starts to watch porn destroying a perfectly good marriage, or why our best friend must care for her elderly father who has Alzheimer's while her child has autism???

But to be told that "God doesn't gives you what you can't handle" is such a lie. These are all things that just happen and God who is love doesn't give you "things" that are contrary to who He is!

Then why do these things happen? Again, because we live in a fallen world and our Savior has not returned yet. Honestly, I don't have a better answer than that. I wish I did.

But here is the beauty of this. God does give us what we "need" to deal with these situations. He gave us Jesus Christ. I know to some it sounds catty, but it's the truth. First, we have to believe that Jesus died for our sins and offers us forgiveness for our life. And then when that happens and you begin to develop that walk with Jesus you will begin to see that He is giving you what you "need" to deal with the situation. 

Many people say "life goes on" but in reality, God is giving us the resources. People to pray for us. Doctors to help with medical treatments. Meals that come from strangers. And more. from others. But he is also using this to build your relationship with Him. He wants you to go to Him and tell Him you can't do it alone and you need help. He wants us to realize that we can't do it alone. When we exchange our pitiful pleas for genuine faith in Him, situations begin to look differently. I'm not saying that we will always like the outcome because again, we live in a broken world. BUT, God will use everything for His glory - if we just allow Him to.

I also believe that when we focus on cries to God and He works in us for our own situation, our eyes become open to others around us. We begin to see the tragedies in others lives. And again, it's what we do with that that marks who we are as individuals.

I'm not saying it's easy. Goodness knows I have my share of these trials. We all do in some way at some point in our lives. But it's what we do under adversity that really marks who we are. Do we run around crying out to others for help or do we fall on our knees and cry out to God? In the end, it takes courage to trust in God. 

And so I believe it's OK to correct someone when they say to you "God doesn't give you more than you can handle." It's just not Biblical.

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