Honor your father and mother. Then you will live a long, full life in the land the Lord your God is giving you. Exodus 20:12I know this is a tough one having wrestled through it myself. And this is why I think going through the 12 step program or Celebrate Recovery program is so helpful (along with some good Christian counseling).
We all have a mother and a father. That is a fact. Some of us might have been raised by one or both or neither. And so some of us might actually have more than one mother or father in a sense. And whatever your circumstance or relationship with your parents, I cannot speak to.
I can say that I myself had to deal with "issues". Let's face it..most of us do.
But what I have learned from dealing through these items is the following:
1. They raised me based on what their past was shaped by (see yesterday's devotional post)
2. They are humans just like I am. They have to deal with circumstances in life. As we grow older we no longer hold our parents on that pedestal. In fact, we quickly take them off of it and replace it with something else. If you are reading this blog then you probably replaced it with drugs, alcohol, pornography etc. And only once we hit rock bottom do we replace our parents, our addiction with the true father - our Father God. And we put Him on the pedestal.
3. And lastly, and I think the most important, is that I am an adult. Yes, I have my past, but I know right from wrong. I can make my own decisions. And I am accountable for my decisions. I am accountable to my family, I am accountable to my spouse and kids, I am accountable to my job, and friends and church. But most importantly, I am accountable to God. And to Him, it is where my faith lies.
And so, working through the steps ( for me it was Celebrate Recovery but they are basically the same) I was able to forgive my parents for their choices that were wrong and honor them. But now I honor them not on the pedestal, but rather as humans with the love and grace and mercy that God shows me each day.